Into The Darkness

inward descent, introspection, more time to unplug and reckon with our shadows

I walked outside to gather firewood early this morning, the first day of winter in New England. The sky was dark except for bright stars. Frozen grass sparkled as though it were a moving body of water. I tried to film it but it was impossible to capture. Now the sun is rising; an orange glow behind distant mountains and bare trees. This is a naked time. A time when life outside is stripped down and raw. A time to go within. A time to be nourished and soothed by the dark. 

Sunrise this morning

Variations of the word ‘dark’ have been used to describe horrors and suffering in the world, and within people. But I believe many of our problems stem from too much artificial light. Too much stimulation, too much screen time, too much misplaced anger, too many firearms, too many bombs, and too much blame. We need more darkness. More inward descent, more introspection, more time to unplug and reckon with our shadows. We need rest — deep restorative rest — and reconnection to fertile ground. Ground that holds us, supports us, and nourishes us. Ground that we become, eventually. Ground where we will nurture new seeds of life. 

Photo by Daniel Hajdacki on Unsplash

Much of the language, practice and ritual that dominate healing and spirituality today emphasize light, but ancient and present-day earth-based traditions spring from fertile darkness and honor light and dark in equal measure. These balanced observances are in alignment with the true forces of nature. For it is in the fertile darkness that we plant new seeds and life is conceived. The mystery of darkness is where growth and transformation begin. While well-​meaning, I find the expression “love and light” to be incredibly irritating. Some teachings suggest we reconfigure “negative” words with positive affirmations to hypnotize ourselves into happiness. While that may work for some, the practice never resonated with me. I want to unmask my shadows and see them for what they are. When we overvalue light, we set ourselves up to struggle with just being.

In ancient and present-day goddess-centered traditions, people tap into the power of darkness by going into caves, wombs of Earth, to experience sensory deprivation. Descending into caves was and is seen as a way to achieve knowledge; caves are spaces where the noise of the external world is blocked out so innate wisdom can arise. Dark, subterranean spaces are places to engage mystery and, in some cases, attain enlightenment. Whether it's a cave, sensory deprivation tank, camping in the woods or simply drawing curtains to block street lights, entering or creating spaces that mimic the natural flow of day into night can reset our circadian rhythm — our biological clock that lets us know when it’s time to sleep, wake, reproduce, and consume. 

I believe that the most powerful parts of life are often unseen. We might be afraid of what exists under the surface, yet within those voids and unseen spaces growth and healing can truly begin. Our imaginations may go wild when we’re unable to see what’s in front of us on or below the surface of a deep, dark loch but the dark rarely harbors our fears. It usually exposes them. The quiet dark exposes what we unwittingly carry and can offer clarity if we embrace it. In the dark, we can see what we fear, When we imagine things that go bump in the night we are, in large part, recreating scenes from the light where we gather images and excess noise — often from other people. A safe dark space affords us the chance to see clearly the monsters we carry. 

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Wonder and awe exist everywhere in some form. The beauty of sun rises, the consistency and promise of nature. And yet, so many of us rush by, distracted by screens, virtual worlds and the overwhelm of our own minds.

So today and especially tonight, I invite you to embrace the dark. To redefine the word and the idea of darkness in your own way. To welcome the dark in all of its nourishing calm and deep restoration, and its ability to help us see ourselves clearly.